Monday, 25 May 2009

It happened one morning and never happened again

One bright, sunny morning (the way British like) I woke up with a snow white envelope in my left hand ( i m a southpaw, so technically its correct). Rubbing my puffy eyes I opened the envelope with a child's curiosity. Aside: Who could and why would anyone send me a letter in this age of E- mail. Anyhow I hurriedly took out a crisp, neatly folded blue paper. On it were scribbled these lines:

"Lets spare the world! Your times up."
p.s: we are being lenient, you have 24 hours.
Good Luck!
Angel of Death
Human Resource Dept.

Do not expect me to tell you what I had to go through or what my reaction was! Fear? Goosebumps? sweating like a pig while counting my limited breathes, fidgeting? nope, no, nothing like that. I was not astonished, neither did i feel my heart sinking into the deepest, unknown hide outs in my body (what? hmm). And most of all yes, unfortunately i did faint. Fainted! yes. Not because I was on a verge of having a cardiac arrest. No. Nothing that terrible. Just because I thought that 24 hours were so LESS! so unfair! I was overwhelmed with uncontainable excitement. So much to do in such a short time span!

When I finally regained my conscious, I pinched myself quickly and read the letter one more time. I couldnt organise my thoughts; all came jumping, running and galloping, crashing into my mind! Only if they had informed me before time I could have done it better.

I started off by making a long list of things i could do in the remaining 23 hours. I spent one hour fainting dramatically and staying unconscious. I decided I would first go and rob a bank. After all everyone should have a little adventure before they go UP. Talking of UP, theres a new animated movie called UP that I might have watched only if... Anyhow i was off to some of my mischief and violating the law. totally unleashed, no responsibility of being a responsible citizen. Then I went to a theme park and took all the rides, especially the roller coaster a number of times until I felt like throwing up.

Yes, yes you are right about that...the police aka cops (sounds cool) was after me! Of course robbing a bank is no joke! I went and hid in a cinema and watched all the movies they were showing -back to back. This saved my life for more than six hours. My genius mind was gliding, working fast like Mojo jojos!

To keep the long story short, by the time I came out I surrendered and landed in a jail. In this country every politician has to take a nice trip to the jail once at least, the more the better, for a successful career.

Dont expect me to end this piece with the mymotherwokemeup or ifelloffthebed kind of an ending although the whole writing is the 'silly piece of words', as if i care!! Well I did die. yes! The angel took me but now lets have some privacy and peace. I cant tell you what I am doing up here! *smug*

The End
ghostly ever after

OR ....

You know the kind Shakespeare did. Like he made his heroes tragic heroes and people cried at their tragic flaw and that one mistake they make that costs them their life. well yes that classic tragic ending. So here it goes. Ending number 2. REWIND! Darn the dvd's getting stuck.. and zoom we go back to where I was caught by the cops and ended up behind the bars.

to be continued...
lots of commercials.

To keep the long story short, by the time I came out I surrendered and landed in a jail. In this country every politician has to take a nice trip to the jail once at least, the more the better, for a successful career.

Soon my fame, and luck and excitement seemed like a drag. Like you go through when reading Twilight and thinking why is the same thing mentioned on every other page? 23 hours had long been over; how come i was still alive? i fell asleep while still in an Aside conversation with myself.
The sweltering, suffocating heat within the enclosed cell walls woke me up. i realized I'm still alive. A LIVE. Another tiny white envelope was tucked into my pocket. Only its edge was peeping out from the brown khakies.

I quickly pulled it out. Deja vu. Opened it in such a rush that I tore half a page. It was pink this time. On it was scribbled in an untidy writing, unlike the previous calligraphy font.

We are sorry. there has been some terrible mistake. the virus in our computer gave us your name. you are too bad for our place up here. we only take good people and thank God you showed us your evil side. you have truly saved us. You can continue with creating havoc down where you are. have fun! Toodles! chao! Hasta la vista ( not so soon)
good luck angel of death human resource dept
p.s: my team is saying a big halo to you.

Aside and aloud to myself: Sheesh! Someone free me from this jail!!! *screams*

The audience gets up and leaves the empty popcorn boxes and cold drinks and used tissue papers in the hall. murmuring to each other, 'i m glad the ending was happy', 'ya happily ever afters are rare..'


DPhatsez said...

che! so sorry i didn't quite watch the movie. I was busy making out with my gal.

Why are people returning with eggs and tamatarz? Oh yea! To throw at the screen

Glad you ain't dead yet

Anonymous said...


Baree Pakistani fillum hey ;)

TehBoogieMonsterMan ^_____^ said...

I'm still trying to figure out WHAT happened here. I read this like a super-fast action novel thingy =/

Again...what is thsi all abotu?

Hilariously written nonetheless =D

Ubaid said...

aap ka _____ kharab ho gaya hai :p ....

hahahaha .... kya ker rahi ho aaj kal that you thinking such things :p

Mubi said...

DPhatsez, eww :p there are no ppl with eggs or tomatoes :p they liked the ending!

specy, lol kahan say pakistani fillum? it was a totally different one...btw i didnt mean it to be a film, i took some 'literary' liberties :p

boogie! :o u dont know what happened? i got a notice of death, is that enough? :p

ubaid, i dont do fill in the blank:p

AD said...

my God the horror!

what have you been up to lady?

Anonymous said...

wow ! Lol ! :D
That IS creativity ! :D

lost in rome said...

lolol lollll literally i did laugh out aloud!!!! one of ur best pieces...

first thing first, i'd have a heart attack n die 24 hrs earlier if i get a lettter...n if i survive ill pray oh please God dont kill me nt yet...

loved it esp the rewind n other ending wala part

lakin end pa i was a bit confused this all thing was happening in a movie?

uglyduckling91 said...

LOL! What if you killed yourself before your time was up? =o

End hi ho jata. xD

Enjoyed it (Y)

Mubi said...

AD, totally innocent, been up to nothing! :p

cavalier, ehehe tx!

lost, ehehe, i didnt think it was this good :D as for the last part...well i love adding that to everything :p

beaugly, :o :O didnt think of that!

Beauty and the BEast said...

awwwwwwwsum!! I love the pace and love the sense of humor!!!

It kept me laughing long after this comment

Mubi said...

i assume you are 'beauty' and not the beast :D glad it made you laugh :p ehehe..and welcome to the blog...


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